But I hope Bill comes tonight. He won't, I guess, coz Mom's home. She's been acting kinda weird lately. I think something must be bothering her. I hope she's not getting spishus.Dearest Jan;I hope you're not going to be mad at me but Jim and I are friends again. It doesn't change how I feel about you but it's not like with you. He is more considerate now, after I told him why I wouldn't go with him any more. I bet you'd like it too, if you tried it. (Not with your cousin, of course. That's incest.)Anyway, Jan darling, I still want you. You're still the best!Your ever lovingEileenBonny was in turmoil during this period when her nephew was planning and executing the lascivious debauchment of her young daughters. Her state of mind was essentially unrelated to Bill but, rather, was due to an ever growing need for the sexual fulfillment that had been missing since before her ex-husband's departure some six months ago. She had been on the verge of consummating sexual liaisons on two. “I feel ... detached. It might help to have someone remind me what I’m supposed to be doing.”She nodded, and we went down to the kitchen, cooking together for the first time in forever. She kept nudging my attention back to the task at hand, and we eventually got dinner together. I’d like to tell you that it was a great meal and we took it as a sign that we worked better together, but it was just sausages and mashed potatoes. Nothing special. We didn’t even work well together. She wasn’t used to being in the kitchen anymore, and I was slipping in and out of a drug induced fog, feeling calm, but disconnected.We sat at the table and I stared at her, remembering random times we’d sat at this table in the past while my food started to get cold until her voice broke through and reminded me to eat. We didn’t really speak during dinner, and once it was done, we looked at each other awkwardly. I got up and started to clean up the dishes. I really was feeling calm at the moment. I knew that.
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